What am I looking for at a time like this?
Love, giving and gifts at Christmas,
The month of cheers and new years bliss,
Family, friends, times for remembrance,
Still I feel grateful for this holiday time,
But sometimes cave in, then follows my subside.
I am not comfortable in my depiction,
and fear for our prehistoric constriction,
I search for my half, though trapped in my past,
The bridges are built, but which side do I cross?
Left or the right or do I jump off the centre?
Nothing will make this any less real.
How can I be myself when I can’t figure this out?
Was I confident in my social norms? Is this my need to change?
Yesterday was one headline, but today is something new,
My problem is evil, don’t know what to do?
Now my head is a wondering mess.
I have to admit, I am a work in progress.
Tried to send you away, but keep following back,
Some days it is like being under attack.
This reflection may not be all that clear,
The truth may not be, how it would first appear.